Stuff On TV

Two random things I discovered while watching tv. 

#1-  I was watching Animal Cops:  Luckiest Babies.  That right there should have been a big no-no for me.  But it said "luckiest babies" so that has to mean happy endings right?  It did but that didn't make the situations any less sad.  One Mommy dog and her litter of fourteen puppies (four-frickin-teen!) had been abandoned in a house.  It was obvious no human had been there in a long time.  Every puppy from that litter was a cute chunky little baby.  Every single one of the fourteen!  What an fantastic Mommy.  Some dogs suck at being Moms.  This was not one of those dogs.  I hope she got some great treat and a lucky family to spoil her.  She deserves it.

#2-  I'm constantly looking for cheerleading shows online.  Mostly the competitions that have recently aired.  My sister was able to see all of them and I haven't found even the tail-end of one.  We have the same channels.  I don't get it.  So I'm flipping through the guide and I see Cheerleader Camp.  I get totally excited!  Then totally disappointed.  It's a porno.  This happens to me every time.  Cheerleader Camp, Cheerleader Tryouts, Cheerleaders, etc.  I must say I was suspicious when once I read Sassy Cheerleader Girls.  That title tipped me off.  You'd think I'd remember but I see the word "cheerlead" in it and I get all giddy.  I'd like to point out that I always read the description and even if I simply clicked it, we don't get that particular naughty channel.

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Have you ever seen something on tv and wanted to comment to someone about it but no one was there with you?

Scared

Even while we were still thinking about getting pregnant I was getting nervous.  As the due date is getting closer, I'm starting to freak out more and more.  I am terrified of having a repeat csection experience.  Terrified!  If it goes badly again, this will probably be our last baby and I really don't want that.  I'm hoping for four kids.  A person can only take so much trauma.  It really messed with me and made many things... uncomfortable to deal with.  I still replay it over and over in my head and recall all the awful little details.  "Women forget the pain of childbirth"  bull-fucking-shit!  I call a B.S. on whoever made that crap up.  I can tell you every terrible part in painful, gory detail while I'm crying my eyes out and lash out at anyone who so much as attempts to touch me how much lying horse crap is in that saying.  Perhaps fools forget.  I will never.

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Please for the love of whomever, don't let me feel anything.  Please, oh please, let the drugs work.  Please.  Please let this happen without traumatizing me too badly.

Pretty please?

Shake Your Tushy

My sweet Avabella,

I'm going to tell myself that it's because you absolutely love it.  Let's just put that out there in the open now.  You see, this evening I was listening to Nickelback and I thought you might want to hear them also.  I mean they are pretty awesome.  Your big brother, Jasper, heard them when he was in my belly too.  He didn't wiggle as much as you did though.  The music wasn't up very loud or anything crazy like that, but when I put the headphones against my belly... the princess started getting her groove on!  I could see you turning, elbows, feet and tushy moving every which way.  There was flopping over and stretching galore!  Wouldn't you know it, I go to wake Daddy up so he can see... nothing.  Not even a random twitch from you.  D-I-V-A.  Oh well, I had so much fun.  I'll be doing it much more frequently now so I can find out what music gets your little groove on.  I'm sure your big brother will love to help.  He adores music (and the headphones) too.  Only 68 more days until you're here!

Lots of love, hugs and kisses
-Mommy

Violent Imagination

Few people realize how much of a bitch I can be. Which surprises me. Often times, when a person is pissing me off this song plays on repeat in my head. And all my people have a dance rave to it while we stomp your face in and hurt you. Hurt you very, very badly. The torture I've imagined is brilliant. So today's disturbed thoughts of violence are dedicated to that special bitch who can't help but piss me off every chance she gets. I hope it makes you smile, too.

Jones vs. Knowles

Orlando Jones meet your long lost sister Solange Knowles.Click on the image to be taken to its source.

Bitch Be Crazy

Big problem. Big big problem. I've come to the conclusion my anti-depressants are making me violently ill. Like intense uncontrollable exorcist vomiting and then shaking. That can't be good right? I haven't been taking them every day like I'm supposed to because I haven't felt well (plus I'm forgetful while pregnant). Now I know why. This also explains my terrible "morning sickness". I'm willing to bet it wasn't morning sickness, seeing as it happened about 3-4 hours after I take my antidepressant every day. Hmm, suspicious. I'm going to stop taking them until my Dr. appt in a few days. Hopefully she'll have a good answer for me.

You know how the Hulk says, "You wouldn't like me when I'm angry."?

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Well, it's kinda like that for me when I've been off my meds. You wouldn't like me without my crazy pills. Hell, I certainly don't like me. Which is part of the problem. In fact, now that I think about it, running around yelling "Tayia SMASH!" holds quite the appeal.

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When I don't take them I get this intense body tingly thing that I can not stand and I'm disoriented. Not to mention the fact that I go kinda bitch postal for the tiniest reasons and then enjoy harming myself. Ya, not good in the slightest. In case you were wondering though, I haven't done that in a very long time. Oh I've wanted to. But I haven't. I made Justin a promise and I'll keep my word to him no matter what.

Oh man, this isn't going to end well. Poor Justin. He's the one that's gonna have to put up with my cray-cray ass. I hope the doctor has an amazing solution I have simply overlooked in my freak-out.

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Growing Up

Jasper is growing up so fast. The list of things he says and does is too long to even attempt to keep track of anymore. I love watching him process things and then seeing the light bulb click on.The first one is him playing outside with a bucket helmet. He loves the bucket helmet. The next pics are naked time after a bath. He ran and crawled in there on his own (like everything else). He thought it was hilarious to get into Dobby's kennel and shut the door. I had to get a pic of him being a goof.

So yesterday he was having some naked time which always starts off by him running through the house, arms raised high yelling, "I feeeee!" (I'm free). Then he went in his room to watch Mickey Mouse. Out he comes just a few minutes later, "Uh-oh"
"What 'uh-oh'?" I say back, "Did you go pee or poop in your room?" To which he quickly replies, "Okay". Then goes back in for more Mickey. Once I got in the room I couldn't see any obvious place where he'd gone "uh-oh" so I asked him, "Where did you go potty?"
"I dun know. Whey?"
"Well, I don't know. You're the one who went potty, not me. Where did you go pee or poop?" Big pause... nothing happening. "Show me, please."
Big sigh, "Ah rieeeet." (all right) He started to get off the bed, I'm hoping to show me, when I step in pee.
"Eeew! Found it."
Small snickers and giggles, "yeah."
"Thanks, dude." My sarcasm is lost on him...I think.
"Yeah." Then starts dancing to Mickey.

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Oh silly Jasper.

Justin always kisses Me and Jasper and says I love you before he leaves for work. Jasper told him that he loved him too last night. That's a first. He'll say, "high fife" (high five) if he's done something good. I blow raspberries on him all the time. He learned how to do it back about two days ago. I hate getting it done to me 'cause it tickles so dang bad. But that's what good Mommies do. They get sticky raspberries blown on them. Thank you, oranges, for the sticky. Jasper peeled an orange all by himself. One of those "Cuties are made for kids" oranges. He was feeding me tiny little chunks of it with the biggest smile on his face, "I did! I did! Mom-mom-mom-y, I did!" The mess didn't even matter. He did it. All on his own.

I look forward to each day just to see what he'll do next.

Rocking out with my new headphones on. Gah, the cuteness! Gah, the horrible quality!